The Endo....

DUN DUN DUUNNNN (enter mysterious music here)

I was talking to my friend, NaTasha, on my home from taking the kids to the Endocrinologist yesterday and once she found out where I had been she asked "So was the 'Good Mommy' report ok today?" Let me translate, the only info she really knows about diabetes is what I have taught her. She knows how I feel about the kids A1c and how I automatically relate it to my self esteem. (more on why I do this in a minute) Her little joke about it being my "Good Mommy" report actually made me laugh, mostly because I had good news to report. Not that the appointment wasn't stressful, because it totally was, but their A1c's are not as bad as I had expected.

When I picked the Princess up from school and told her where we were going she almost instantly got grumpy. It came out of left field since she has always loved going to see Dr. Chad and Dr. Swinyard (They really are THE best doctors in the world. I can't say that enough!) She just pouted the entire way there, but when we walked into the office, she flipped out. Need I remind you that she is almost 6? A little too big (in my mind) to be throwing fits like this in public. Problem is though, she has been doing this a lot lately. Imagine this, we where at the bridal store with my sister in law looking at wedding dresses. A 5 year old girl's dream. Something didn't go her way and she ended up on the floor in the middle of the store kicking her feet and screaming and crying. I immediately tested her blood sugar and it was perfectly normal. I was shocked. I tried to deal with it the best I could and put her in a time out and talked to her, but it took her a good 15 - 20 minutes to calm down. Then a few nights later I was trying to get her to drink a glass of milk and she did the same thing. She even headbutted me and made my lip bleed. I went to bed so mad and confused. So in a small way I was happy the Dr. office could witness what was going so I could ask a few questions about it. Problem is though this terrible mood was picked up my my Little Man and he was throwing a fit too. By the time Dr. Chad came in to see us I was sitting in the room crying. We were all a bit of a mess. We talked for a bit and he offered some help. He said that it might be nothing more than her just throwing a fit...being moody. But it could be more (I agree and that is what I was afraid of) nothing major but just stress of life (a hem, is this not all my life consists of?) compounded with 2 kids being diabetic and all of us, including the kids, are in survival mode trying to cope with everything. Our family is just going through a lot right now. So he gave me a few numbers to social workers that deal mainly with families/kids/adolescence/ that have diabetes. He said to see if we can take the family in and find a way to all work through it. This may or may not be needed but I tell you what, I am more that willing to give it a try. I need a little fresh air and this just might be the only way I can find it so I am calling on Monday.

When Dr. Chad and I were talking he said "We all know that even under the stress of life you and your husband are doing a great job. We know this because 'Princess' A1c is 7.4 and 'Little Man's' is at 5.8." I was pretty excited to hear those numbers, but don't get me wrong the first thought that went through my head was "that is why I let the A1c's determine my self esteem because the doctor in a way does." Not that this is bad. For all he knows I could be at home letting my kids eat whatever they want and put on their log sheets whatever I want. The only true test is that darn A1c. Thankfully they are pretty good even after the longest and hardest 2 months of my life.

So we made a few changes with both kids. We all left with smiles mostly because the kids got candy and a toy and I got some help. It was a rough visit, but as NaTasha put it "It seems that it had to happen that way so you could find the answers that you truly needed." She is right!

Little Man is not so little anymore.

We ran out of diapers the night before last night so when my Little Man woke up and needed his diaper changed I thought "I might as well potty train him." He is the same age that I potty trained my other kids so I had thought about doing it sometime soon, but I hadn't planned on doing it yesterday. I wanted to wait a bit. The poor kid has been through a lot in the last few months. First we take away his binky in October (which he was totally attached to) then in November he was diagnosed with Diabetes. I didn't want to change his entire life around in just a few short months. But out of necessity, I kind of did need to do it, or go to the store at 5 in the morning. So I thought I would give it a try.

When I posted on facebook that I was potty training my friend Holly called me a "potty training ninja." (love you Holly!) This comment came right as I was headed out the door to go buy some diapers. LOL! We started and I thought he wasn't ready. I was backing out. Until I read that and thought I can't stop now. That is going against I have ever said about potty training. So I didn't give in and we kept going with it. (thanks Holly!)

I am happy to report that he hasn't had an accident at all in almost 24 hours. He even went potty at the store and the best of all he woke daddy up in the middle of the night to go. No accidents at night even without a diaper or pull up! YAY!

I am super proud of him. I guess he was ready after all!

I am still waiting a few days to see if I can say he was potty trained in one day or not....remember less than one week is my goal. I want to see if he regresses at all today or not. I will give my final thoughts on this in a few days.

Wish us luck!

(Ignore the not so good quality of this picture. Thanks so much)

I over heard her tell her little brother the other day "You're going to grow up to be a really great guy some day! "

As much as I would like to think I "get it" when I talk to other people that are living with diabetes I just can't to it's fullest. But these two can really say to each other that they get it!

That just might be the only reason I would be grateful to have more than one diabetic child.

I had to copy and paste Amy's comment, just because I love it! I did miss some fun things!! Reading this totally makes me laugh! Thanks Amy, I love you!



"Wow!!! What a good recounting of the crazy events!!! You forgot to mention our matching Target hats, the elevator/urinal, NaTasha almost puking from car sickness, signs on EVERY shop door stating "We DO NOT SELL UMBRELLAS OR RAIN BOOTS!",the dead dog story (sniff, poor Waldo), asking every passerby WHERE they got their cute galoshes, are Creme de la Crepe...that smelled like moldy dog! hahaha Obviously I had a SUPER time too!!! I love you so much and I am so glad we got to blow off a little steam! We are DEFINITELY going again!!! <3"

Ahhh...I love these girls!

Dear NaTasha and Amy,

I had the best time in Long Beach with you! We should do it once a week. Ok maybe once a month! Either way, we MUST do it again! I came home feeling refreshed and like me again.

There aren't many people that can say they flew to Long Beach, spent the entire day chatting in the hotel room and watching TV and still loved it! The shopping the next day was awesome too! Even in the pouring rain! Too bad we never did find the golashes, but I think I came home with THE coolest umbrella ever!

I am still thanking the heavens above for my cat like reflexes that saved our lives when I realized I was driving down the street going the wrong way, and for Karen the Computer Wife (aka the GPS) for helping us get back on track when I missed the freeway exit twice in a row.

There are a few things that will never be the same though. Like making waffles. Who knew they were so hard to make? And my elbow. With holding the extra small umbrella and everything else in my hand I swear I didn't see that pole right in front of me. Too bad my face was the last thing to see it.

I can't stop laughing about our miss-booking for our 2 double beds for our 2nd night there! Expedia really needs to be told that the "Dreamcatcher Room" is not suitable for 3 adult, heterosexual woman, and that it infact does NOT have 2 double beds. The owners were really nice and it was cute despite the 2 headless women in the hallway. Honestly, there would have been a better story to tell if we actually did stay there. I think I better keep the "theme rooms" for a stay with just me and my hubby! LOL!

We need to be grateful that this trip was still able to happen. I can't believe that the night before we left the airport was closed down because it had flooded. We made it though and walking through a river to get inside the airport was not really all that bad. The stress of the flight home was a little more than I could bear. Leaving the two of you to sleep in the airport (since you refused to spend the night together in the "lover's lounge") was not what I wanted to do. THANK GOODNESS they packed us all onto that flight like sardines. Well maybe I felt a little more like a sardine because I was strapped to a board at the very back of plane squished next to 2 other strangers, and left to fly backwards. Did I tell you yet that flying jumpseat isn't very fun? Who cares though, because we all made it home together!

Really, let's do this again soon!

Much Love,
Shannon

Wanna know?

Incase you care...

~My laptop doesn't have photoshop on it. I can't post pictures here cuz all I shoot in is RAW and I can't resize them. Hence the lack of "cuteness" on my blog.

~I am happy today. Really happy. And I don't know what makes today any different than any other not so fun day, but I am taking it! It has been awhile.

~My sister in law got engaged and I am SUPER DUPER happy for her! She is marrying a great guy and they will live happily ever after. I am sure of that!

~My trip to Long Beach was FANTASTIC!! I needed to just go away and hang out. We went on a 2 day hunt for golashes and umbrellas. I bought THE last umbrella in all of Southern California and it was a Lightning McQueen one. Little Man was one happy camper when I brought it home! I honestly loved every minute of my little getaway! Next time I am hoping to hop on a plane and getaway with my hubby. Now wouldn't that be awesome?

~My little speech for the JDRF was rescheduled. Someone got word that I was coming and started to 2nd guess the whole thing all together. Ok not really, but I was getting really excited about it. Now I just have more time to polish my lame jokes and find a talent for not crying in public.

~Little Dude has found a series of books that have him totally engrossed in reading lately. Anyone ever read The Adventures of Captain Underpants? I swear they were written for him. I even laugh out loud when reading them. Reading time is quite enjoyable at our house lately.

~I found out why Little Dude has been sneaking so much food lately. First let me tell you that he doesn't know how to tell anyone that he feels low yet. The only thing that I have been able to catch on to is when he says "Mommy, I need you." That means that he is a not well. But I have realized that when he has been getting into the food he is low. This has been hard for me to catch on to, but lately when I test him after he has gotten into the food he hasn't gone "too" high. I think that his breakfast carb ratio is too high. We shall see, a few more days of monitoring really close and I might need to make a few changes.

~I am totally addicted to The Bachelor. I don't even know how it happened. It got recorded on my DVR on accident and now my hubby and I find ourselves on the couch every week. Insane I tell you. But don't worry my heart still belongs to American Idol.

~My kids woke up this morning with some really tough questions that they wanted me to answer while I was still half asleep. Really! Check it out! The VERY first thing my Princess asks me before she is even out of bed all the way "Why do we need belly buttons?"


There now you know just about everything there is to know about my last week. Consider yourself updated by another really lame bullet point post.

your welcome :)

Call me crazy....

It's ok everyone else does.

But I feel I have a few good excuses.

The first being diabetes.

The second is having two kids with diabetes.

Ok I know I use that as an excuse for everything. I find myself telling random people to "Oh just ignore my crazy children. They are a little high right now."

Never do I realize that person doesn't get it.

However, I do enjoy the times when I ask the kids in public if they are high and someone hears it then gives me a nasty look. Do they REALLY TRULY think that my 5 year old and 2 year old are ACTUALLY high on drugs? Come on! These are moments every parent of a diabetic has and enjoys. Call it one of the very few perks.

I have been reading over some of my blog posts lately and I have decided reading my blog isn't any fun anymore. All I do is complain or talk about diabetes. Or complain about diabetes. I do have a life outside of diabetes. And believe it or not, I actually do have another child. You may not remember though, he is the older non-diabetic one. Poor kid has been getting the shaft here on my blog. Lots of things are actually. I kind of miss posting about non diabetic things.

But don't fear, I am leaving diabetes all together for a few days. When I get back I am going to be refreshed and ready to be my old self again. Hopefully anyway. And if not then you can just keep calling me crazy.

A few questions.

Ok I have a few questions for some of my D-moms out there.

#1 We got a blood ketone tester and I am still trying to figure out what the results mean. My tired little brain just can't seem to understand the instructions book.

#2 It seems like my Little Man can not stop eating! I am sure that being 2 and being restricted to when he can eat makes him want to rebel and eat all the time. But how do I know that I am not starving him?

and last but not least

#3 How do we do this everyday and stay sane again?

Love you guys! Thanks in advance for all your help!

Bullet Point Update....because I am to lazy to do anything else.

It is so hard for me to concentrate on anything lately. Which is why I haven't been blogging very much. I felt I needed to at least do an update to keep this blog going. So here you go another bullet point update.

- There was a HUGE weight lifted off my shoulders today. As some of you know as of Jan. 1st our insurance for the kids had to be reviewed. I was afraid that we weren't going to qualify due to income circumstances. Since the care for both of my diabetics alone costs me more than my mortgage payment, this has been something that I have been VERY stressed over. I got a call from them this morning basically telling me we didn't qualify. I cried on the phone...with a guy...a stranger.... I felt pretty pathetic. But he kept asking more questions about our income and such and found out there we do indeed qualify!!! But only for a few more months. I will take it. Then stress about it in April! I can't tell you how happy this made me!

- So since we will now have insurance for a few more months that means that my little man can get a pump next month!!!! He isn't ready for it, but we are still going to get it for when he is ready. Since the insurance covers it 100% we figure now is the time to get it.

- My hubby has been working lots of hours lately. This is great news for us. Last year at this time (and pretty much all year long) hours were a little hard to come by. I am super proud of him handling it the way he does and his willingness to work hard for our family! I love that guy!

-Speaking of my hubby he is training to do a triathlon this summer. He has been running and working out like crazy! He has been loving it! I can't wait to cheer him on!

- I got an email today from the JDRF asking if my Princess, my Little Man and I would be willing to speak at a luncheon for all the Merit Medical employees in a few weeks. I guess they have agreed to sponsor the Walk for a Cure this year and they are having a luncheon to kick off the fundraising and they wanted a family come in and talk about our lives with diabetes and why we want a cure. I am scared and honored to do this! I cried when I got the email. How am I going to stand in front of 100+ people and talk about it without loosing it? Oh well, go for the impact I guess! Princess can't wait for it!

- My new work schedule is in full swing and so far I love it! I get Saturday's off and even better I get to go back to church! I love it!

- My Little Dude is amazing! Super helpful and super smart. I have been finding things all over the house lately of him drawing pictures and writing captions on them. He even started writing a book. I can't tell you how creative he is! I will have to scan the pages in so you can see them! I am so proud of him and the success he has had this year!

- Although he is a good kid, Dude is feeling sort of a minority lately. He keeps saying things like "the diabetics are in the other room, can I have a bowl of ice cream?" Even though he doesn't have diabetes he is still trying to learn a new way of life right now too!

- I have been trying to hold things together here. I don't feel I am doing the greatest job most days and I try to not fall into a pit of depression, but when something wonderful happens there is much celebration! I have been trying to love myself more and not be so hard on myself and each day is a struggle. I am so thankful for friends and family that are supporting me and guiding me each day! I would have fallen hard a long time ago if it weren't for the wonderful people in my life.

- So I think that I might need to go get my thyroid checked again. I have been feeling really sluggish and tired almost all the time. I can't concentrate on anything for too long and I keep forgetting things. Maybe it is my environment, but I have a feeling it is my thyroid giving me problems again. Maybe it is a mixture of both!

- Last Saturday we had a day filled with taking pictures, and it wasn't me taking them this time (which was kind of nice actually) My parents, siblings and all of our kids had a big family picture taken. It was really fun and I can't wait to see them! Then shortly after we ran to Sugarhouse Park and the photographer for the Utah Jazz took our pictures for the JDRF. That was really cool too! They just took pictures of us playing. I can't wait to see those too!

Well ok, that is enough for tonight. Gotta go check blood sugar, make sure homework and reading got done, the get kids ready for bed.

If you made it this far through my long boring post you deserve a cookie! Oh and a thank you! THANKS!

I am so tired.

Diabetes is a beast sometimes.

I wish I could just forget about it sometimes.

I have so much to say but all my mind can muster most of the time is planning when I get to take a nap.

Maybe diabetes isn't the culprit, maybe there is something wrong with me.

I guess going to bed after 12 doesn't help.