A few years ago, when I was a working mom, a friend told me about a blog that I had to read. http://www.dooce.com/ At the time I didn't even know what blogging was, but my friend said that she was funny, from Salt Lake City (where I am from) and that she has been all over the news because of her blog. She is practically famous. She got fired from her job because of her blog.
So I thought it would be interesting to check it out. I have been a faithful reader ever since. I have been reading her blog through pregnancy, post partum depression, being in a mental hospital, family changes, funny moments with her daughter, and even funnier momments with the "Avon's World's Sales Leader". Most of which have been things that I have gone through as well. She has shown to me that no matter what people think of you, you are you. It only matters at the end of the day what you think of you.
Her post today really touched me! "Celebrating Five Years of Public Stupidity, The Post" It is a subject that is dear to most of my readers. Staying at home with your kids. So I would love for you guys to stop by and read it. Let me know how you feel on the subject. I would love to see what some of my readers think about it.
For me, staying at home was the hardest decision that I have ever had to make. At the time my husband wasn't in the work feild that he wanted to be, he was still going to school, and I made more money than him. These were all things that we stressed about daily. I knew that I wanted to be at home with my kids. I knew that I wanted to raise my kids, not the babysitter. I knew that I wanted to be there for them when they needed me. I also knew that if I quit my job, we may not be able to pay our bills. This was a very hard time for me. Well, with a lot of thought and a little planning, and a ton of praying, my husband and I decided that I was going to quit.
I am not going to sit here and say that every day has been wonderful. From the name of my blog we all know that it isn't. But I have been blessed in so many ways since I have been home with them. I have been blessed with patience, more love, oportunities, great times, the ability to teach, and to learn, the means to make it work financially every month, best of all a relationship with my kids that I wouldn't have had any other way, and many more ways than I can even count.
Mostly I love being at home with my kids. They are the joy of my life. I wouldn't have changed the last year and a half for anything!
5 comments:
I am impressed and inspired by your strength and faith. I know that it took a lot to quit your job, and I know you've made many sacrifices to stay at home. I also know that you are a wonderful mom. You are fun and creative and WONDER MOM! Even though I know you are a mommygoingcrazy, I know you're the best at what you do. (keep up the good work!)
Becca, thank you so much! It has been hard, but it makes it easier when I have great friends like you! You have been a great friend for many many years. There is never enough thank yous in this world to thank you enough! Here's to another 10 years of friendship!
That was a great post she wrote. I do wish she'd engage her readers more. I was slightly bummed when she stopped allowing comments. But then I was commenter number 1487 or something like that. :)
I agree that us sahm's don't get enough respect. This is a very important job that we do, and it's a shame that it's not an opportunity that is available for all parents who want to stay at home, even for longer than the standard 6-12 week maternity leave.
This is a great blog, which I've discovered through Emily's. :)
Ok you guys~ this is a very emotional subject for me...I've been going to college for the last several years, but only part-time so that I wasn't away from my kids too much. I found a daycare that I really liked and my younger daughter and my oldest son went there two days a week (4 hrs. a day) while I was in school. (My older daughter was is school and my younger son wasn't born yet.) Everything was going well until one day, the start of a new semester for me, and my daycare lady called to tell me she was closing down her daycare due to "a family emergency". So, I made other arrangements, and my mom watched the kids. Come to find out the so-called "family emergency" was sexual molestation allegations against her 14 year old son! Fortunately, my kids were NOT molested, because they were never there when the boy got home form school and there arrived after he was already gone. After all the investegations and court hearings, he was charged with molesting 10 children!! So, needless to say, I will NEVER put my kids in ANY daycare again! Regardless of how wonderful the caregivers may be...I'm not taking that chance. Well, I since then have put my schooling on hold until the kids are older. But at the end of last summer, my husband got laid off, and had a hard time finding another job. So, I needed to pick up the slack, and as much as I hated to have to do it, I got 2 part time jobs. He became the stay-at-parent. I'll tell ya, I felt so empty inside, being away from my kids! When I stayed at home, ther were times that I wished I worked outside the home maybe 1 or 2 days a week, just for a break. But now that I was "forced" into doing so, it killed me. Now my husband is working (my parents take care of the kids) I plan on cutting back to maybe 2 days a week. I'll get a bit of a break, the extra income helps, and truthfully, I think my boys enjoy spending a day at Grandma and Grandpa's without me around. They get spoiled like crazy, they do new, fun things, and there's always excitement going on. So I think the whole stay-at-home mom vs. working mom varies with each family situation. There also needs to be that balance and I hope I can find that in what I'm looking for. As you can see, I could talk about this all day...sorry to post such a long comment ;)
My kids are grown and I went through staying home and working while my kids were growing up. I guess I should ask them what they would have liked, I know, I loved my mom being at home with me when I was growing up...asking me questions, saying "Hi" when I got home from school and just feeling the safety that she was there. You never know in life if you've really screwed up or if you did okay. I guess we'll all find out when we go to the other side, at least that's what I believe. I think you just have to live your life, being true to what you think is right at the time. Circumstances are different for everyone and as Stephen R. Covey says, no two peoples paradigms are the same. And you know what? Crap happens to EVERYONE, no matter how "good" you're trying to be. The test is, how we act in each situation. Life, go figur. Good luck with yours.
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