Thursday, February 25, 2010

What I REALLY wanted to say but couldn't because I would get fired.

"Yes, just as you said, I have F*#^ lost my mind! This is why they have padded all the walls in my office and are only letting me use sporks for now on."

"Let me just go ahead and pull this airplane out of my back pocket, put it in your route, and write your name on a seat. Will that fix your problem?"

"Didn't you know that it was my job to make you miserable?"

"No! I don't think you know how I feel!"

"Since when was everything free?"

"Sure lets hold together for another 45 minutes for my supervisor to tell you exactly what I just told you!"

"Miracles happen all the time, just not in New York's airspace!"

"I would be happy to pick up the phone and call Mother Nature and ask her when it is going to stop snowing. Do you have the number?"

"Is is really a good idea to try to check your boat engine as luggage? Is it REALLY that important?"

"I have said it a hundred times, they will not let you just go to the ticket counter with an expired passport and let you "talk your way" onto an international flight!"

"I can't give you something that isn't there. Sorry!"

"We don't have rules and regulations just so I will have something to do and you will have something to complain about. They are actually there for a reason."

"If you don't know how Daylight Savings works by now then maybe you should question where you have been for the last 70 years."

"I would be happy to tell you what time to set your alarm clock for, but it probably wouldn't help you get to the airport on time."

"I think you have more problems than not being able to assign a seat."

Can you tell that this last month of working has been SO MUCH FUN? I can not wait for February to be over with! Please let's pray that I don't have to keep working mandatory overtime into March too!


Jennifer said...

OH Shannon! I can only imagine what those calls were like! You are very funny though. I am amazed that you are able to keep your cool with customers. I hope things slow down for you!

Chelsea said...

Wow, it is like you can read my mind! :) I have only been on the phones for a month, but that is exactly all the things I have wanted to say too. Except the boat engine one, I would like to hear the story on that one...haha I sure hope we don't have to have the Mandatory OT in March either! That would SO suck!

Meri said...

Well, you made me laugh! And that is just what I needed!

I'm sorry it has been so hard. Your sense of humor will get you through!

Praying for no overtime!!!!

The Piquant Storyteller said...

I feel your pain! I was a telemarketer for 3 years in college. I said all kinds of choice things under my breath after each call. A friend of mine didn't bother muttering. She would slam her receiver down (we didn't need to hang up the phones since the computer autodialed and hung up for us with one keystroke) and then she would swear like a sailor, pretty loudly, I might add.

Hopefully you can go back to more regular hours soon. Working with the public on the phone is one of the hardest jobs out there I think.

Lora said...

Though this IS funny(particularly the "spork" comment). It is sad that people can't be friendly anymore.

Hope next month bring better weather and no OT!!!

Chari said...

I can just imagine what's coming at you from the other end. Way to hold your tongue! Gold star on your forehead for that!

Donna said...

I so know how you feel! I did tech support for cellular phones for almost 5 years. I finally quite when I just couldnt take it any more and was fearfull of no longer being able to hold my tounge!! =)
Way to go! Hope things are MUCH better next month!

phonelady said...

Okay melissa makes me cry and you make me laugh LOL !!! I know exactly how you feel and how you want so bad to tell them okay let me be responsible for the post office and the weather too right ? okay sure let me call them . too funny absoloutly too funny .

Wendy said...


Did I mention that I'm a telephone triage nurse????


People are something else, I tell ya. Boat engine? Seriously?

Tracy said...

I can relate on SO many levels!! Just take a tiny bit of pleasure in the fact that they are not right in front of you! I get to deal with stupid people and have to do it with a smile on my face AND somehow keep from punching them!

Kelley Anne said...

Thanks! I really needed that laugh right now what with the IROP going on! Loved it!

The Belshes said...


Shamae said...

Well thanks for the laugh...sorry you actually dealt with this. The first one got me laughing and the rest kept it coming.

Lol you are a cutie.