Thursday, June 12, 2008

My heart-

It hurts.

If I were to write a list of days in my life that were pretty crappy this would be the #2 worst day of my life. Maybe #3, but for now lets just say #2 because I am feeling pretty sorry for myself right now.

While I understand and fully believe that trials are sent one's way to help better that person. There is always a lesson to learn. I get it, I promise. But can't everyone agree with me that when something REALLY crappy happens to you your first thought is why me? Well I don't have enough fingers and toes to count how many times I have thought that today.

As far back as I can remember I haven't had the best of luck. Since I have been married that lack of luck just doubled since my hubby has just about as crappy luck as me. Together we totally avoid black cats crossing our path, never bet in Vegas, stay clear of the number 13, never walk under ladders, and always carry a 4 leaf clover in our back pockets. It only helps for short periods of times though.

I am rambling. Partially because I want to vent but I don't have the nerve to say (or type) what has happened at our house today. It sucks really, really bad, and just thinking about it makes me a sobbing buggery mess all over again.

I do need to clarify though. I fully believe with ALL my heart that what ever kind of bad luck we may have, this is something that I signed up for when I agreed to come to this earth. I did that because I had faith that my Heavenly Father has a better plan for me and my family. Every time something this crappy happens to our family, something better always comes along. I may be hurting now, and I may not understand now why this is happening, and I may feel totally picked on, but that doesn't mean that I don't trust my Heavenly Father.

One more thing, to my hubby. I love you more than life itself! I would walk through all the crappy parts in our life together 10 times as long as we get to hold hands through it all. You really are the world to me, and please don't think this is your fault. I think you are the best, and life will only be better because of all this.

Ok, now that I am that slobbering mess, I must end. Maybe sometime I will share whats going on, but for now, please keep us in your prayers. They are really needed!


Sister said...

We are all praying for you and you know it will all work out. Look what happened last time and the blessings that came your way. John 14:18 reads "I will not leave you comfortless: I will come to you." He will guide you as you make your next steps in life.

TravelMama said...

We're praying for you as well. You are a great example of a great family. I really appreciate how often you bear your testimony in your blog. Everyone who reads it is blessed for it. It was great to visit the other day and we hope you'll be up for it again sometime.

Strong Family said...

You probably don't remember meeting me, but I am Mike Strong's (West Jordan High) wife Jennie. I really enjoyed reading about your cute family. You pictures are great. Your kids are adorable. I will pray for you as well.

Maureena said...

I am so sorry that you are going through a rough time. Please know that I'm thinking about you and praying for you and wish you the best.

FitGeGe said...

Hi honey, do you still have my number? Please call me if you need to vent. I'm going to call you later today (Sunday) in case you don't have my number.

I love you, and don't forget: you have tons of friends, including me, that will do anything we can to help.


Kim said...

So sorry to hear that you are going through some shiz right now. I think about you often and hope and pray you can wade through this trial quickly and be onto better times. Loves.

mommyoffour said...

I have been thinking about you a lot lately and remembering all of the times when you stepped in and helped me out. When you dropped by on my birthday to see my house in shambles (a week after the twins were born). I needed you that day more than ever. It was a blessing to see a friendly face and to know that someone cared enough to drop in. I didn't even care about the house being in shambles because I knew that you wouldn't judge me for it.

You are a strength to many people and I know that I have been blessed by your love and service.

I will pray for you and your sweet family. Much love.

Lance and Raegan said...

I am so sorry that things are not going your way. It sucks sometimes...I know.
I am so glad to see you have faith and you will pull through it. I agree that things/trials happen for a reason. It is hard to trust that the lord knows what he is doing especially when it involves your own family but like you said, he does. Usually it makes us stronger and prepares us for something bigger and better. Hang in there. Better days are sure to come. We should get together sometime. Our hubbies are friends and we need to introduce the kiddos. What do ya think?
Let me know if I can do anything for you.

Holly Reed | Reed Photographic said...

You have been in our thoughts every day - we are just sorry we're so far away right now.

arianne said...

I am sorry you are going through a rough time right now. your family is in our thoughts and prayers

Becky and Bryce said...

I hope all is well. We are thinking of you also. It's funny how much we care about your family, especially since we only knew you a short while before you moved but you all made such an impression on us. We sure care about you and wish you the best. Hope your trial is short and happiness returns. We'll be thinking of you and praying for you as well.