Today is going to be a day that I will never forget! Not only was thismorning insane, but as the day went on it didn't get any better. When my little dude was crying to go with grandma I felt so bad for keeping him cooped up that I let him go. It was a little bit more peaceful this afternoon until my mother-in-law had called me to tell me to not freak out. My first thought was what in the world is wrong, and my second was what am I going to freak out about. (Everyone knows that when someone says not to freak out, we all end up freaking out in the end.) She had explained to me that she needed to take my sister-in-law to a lady's house that she cleaned for. I still don't know why, I just know that there were a few problems at that house a few days ago that my sister-in-law knew about. So she packed up all the kids in the van and headed out to this lady's house. Well, when my mother-in-law got there to drop her off, there were police everywhere and they were arresting the lady that they were there to see. Well, apperantly she had an argument with her boyfriend and he went crazy and started shooting a gun. Someone called the cops and he ran. My mother-in-law showed up right in the middle of all this. So the cops made her stay there and not get out of the car. (I need to add a little note that she had a van FULL of kids, one of which is my little dude.) They kept her there all afternoon. They needed my sister-in-law to make a statement and get things cleared up before they would let them go. With hearing all this I could just feel my blood pressure go up because all I could think about is that my son is stuck in a car, at a house where there was just a shooting. They didn't even know where the shooter was. They wouldn't let anyone leave or even get out of the van because they weren't sure if he was going to come back or not.
I was in such a panic! I turned on the news and sure enough, there it was breaking news! My heart started to pound, and all I could do was cry. My mother-in-law put mt little dude on the phone and he started saying "mommy these police cars are really neat! There are lots of them. I am having fun, and I haven't gone pee yet." (ok that was really cute of him to say that, because with his track record in the past few weeks, that was another thing that I started to worry about.) But he didn't even know how stressed out I was. He thought that he was in a movie or something. Well, to sum up the rest of the story, the shooter was later arrested, they let the lady and my family go about an hour and a half later.
This was a crazy experience for me. I realize that maybe I stressed a little too much about it, but it hurt me to know that my son was surrounded by such violence and I wasn't there to protect him. Every time I think about this afternoon I cry. I was so worried for him, and my family.
When you have children all you want to do is protect them from all the evil in the world. All you want to do it hold your hand over their eyes when something is happening that they shouldn't see. Or hold your hands over their ears when there is something that they shouldn't hear. I know that as my kids get older this will not go away, but be worse. I will want to put my hands on their heart so they will never be hurt, so that it will never break, so they will never feel pain, or be sad. That is the hardest part about being a parent. I can't protect them forever from things like this. I know that all I can do is teach them to survive when it does happen. Teach them where to turn. Teach them to choose the right, and pray for them when things get rough. After today, I am not sure that I am prepared for any of that.